The Consciousness Of Overwhelm

(This enquiry into the consciousness of feeling overwhelmed is ongoing. Rather than wait until it is “finished”, I have chosen to share what I’ve discovered so far. If you have anything to add, please drop me an email.)

In early 2026, I had an experience of feeling overwhelmed by a task that I had taken on. Because I had previously lived through a prolonged period of overwhelm, this gave me the presence of mind to step back from what I was doing and observe the thoughts and feelings that were coming up for me.

After my mum died in 2015, I spent approximately half of the next six months staying in her house, sorting through all her belongings and getting the house ready for sale.

My mum’s house was a long way from my home in Wales, and the combination of travelling, staying in my mum’s house alone, sifting through her personal effects, and dealing with the sale of the house, at the same time as grieving, frequently felt like too much to cope with.

At the time, I was too caught up in the emotions and trying to complete the task at hand, so I wasn’t able to detach from how I was feeling for long enough to be able to understand what was going on.

All I knew at the time was that I frequently felt mentally, emotionally and physically overwhelmed by the task at hand.

In February 2026, I decided it was time to clear out the storage unit I had been renting, so, one car load at a time, I brought everything back to my rented studio apartment.

The idea to clear out the unit felt energising. Each car trip went really well and I was surprised at how easily I managed to find space for things in the apartment. I knew I needed to sort through it all and get rid of some of it, but I felt enthusiastic about the challenge.

One day, feeling positive and inspired, I decided to make a start by opening up the various boxes and containers of stuff. Within minutes, my state of being had completely changed.

I felt physically tired, emotionally low and mentally foggy. I recognised this state of being as overwhelm. Because of my previous experience, I had enough awareness to step back and observe what was going on. Proceeding very slowly and deliberately, I made a note of every thought and feeling that arose. As I did this, I was able to gain a deeper insight into the consciousness and mindset of overwhelm.

Having done this, I was able to complete the physical task sufficiently to know that I had made progress and would be able to finish the job.

In this article I would like to share the thoughts and feelings I observed, and the connections I made.

It’s worse than I thought

The first thoughts I observed were:

“There’s more than I thought” and “This will take forever”.

Those thoughts were masking a deeper feeling: that I had fooled myself into believing I could do this, and now I was having doubts. It wasn’t so much the amount of stuff that was getting to me as the feelings that I might have deluded myself and that I might not be capable of doing it after all.

The next thought to arise didn’t really apply to the current situation, but was rather a memory of how I felt back in 2015-16:

“I’ve been lumbered”.

I remember feeling back then that maybe I had drawn the short straw by agreeing to deal with my mum’s physical assets while my brother dealt with the finances and my step-brother dealt with the legal side of things.

As I opened up bags, boxes and containers, I found things I didn’t know I still had.

“I’d forgotten about that” was the next thought.

Was I wrong?

By this time, I could tell I was feeling anxious because I thought:

“I might have made a mistake. What if I can’t do this after all?”

As I write these words, I can see how important it is for me to feel that I can rely on my own judgement and discernment. I need to know that I can trust my perceptions and evaluations.

As soon as I start to think I may have been deluded about something, my mind starts to question everything else. And I mean everything. Sometimes that questioning occurs at the front of the awareness, whereas often it will be an energy of anxious doubt churning away at the back of my mind.

This might seem strange, especially as I was alone at the time, but I felt a sense of humiliation at having taken on something with such enthusiasm, only to feel that I might have been wrong and might not be able to do it after all.

Fear and uncertainty about the future

Faced with mental and emotional overwhelm, my mind tried to be practical and focus on whether I really needed to keep things. The next thought was:

“I don’t know whether to keep this because I don’t know if I might need it in the future”.

I knew that living in the rented apartment seemed like a temporary arrangement, but I had no idea what sort of place I would move to next or when that might happen. Consequently, I didn’t know what to keep.

Hanging on

I could feel an emotion of attachment and hanging on. These objects were keeping me connected to a past in which I experienced loss and in which I was hanging on for fear of further loss.

Memories of the past were surfacing. I felt under time pressure.

Alone without help

I felt alone.

“I have to do this on my own. There isn’t anyone who can help”.

It was my stuff and I had to decide for myself what to do with it. That was important because I knew it had to be my decision. But it brought back memories of times when I had felt overwhelmed, scared, alone and without anyone to help me.

Reflecting on overwhelm

The thoughts and feelings that came up for me in 2026 were similar to those that arose in 2015-15, but not identical. I get the sense there are common themes with overwhelm, whilst each experience has its own flavour.

Aloneness, doubt, the perceived size of the task, fear of loss, attachment, resistance, the surfacing of deeper emotions and suppressed memories… all seem like common aspects of feeling overwhelmed.

If you were walking home one day and found that the path was blocked, which meant you had to take a detour over a mountain, you wouldn’t feel overwhelmed if you had trust and confidence in your own ability. You might not welcome the detour, but it would not be enough to completely overwhelm you.

But when your trust in your own ability to rise to a challenge is questioned, it can feel like a rug is being pulled from under your feet.

Furthermore, if failing to successfully complete the task at hand or navigate through the current challenge, has undesirable consequences, the pressure we feel is increased.

If the thought of dealing with the current situation or the thought of not being able to do it, signifies pain or harm, the size of the challenge seems to grow.

If doing this is going to cause me pain… If not being able to do this is going to bring pain or harm to me or someone else…

This too shall pass

The idea that “this will take forever” ties in with a common theme of overwhelm in people with chronic illness – the idea that the illness is permanent and will never end.

Overwhelm and self-belief

For me, much of this comes down to self-belief.

If I trust in myself, trust in my own capabilities, know that I can do whatever I put my mind to, then I’m less likely to feel overwhelmed.

However, it’s a deep subject and perhaps even asking for help could signify some kind of harm or loss for some people. If you are suddenly presented with an overwhelming situation that means you will have to cancel plans with someone or let someone down, that too can add to feeling overwhelmed.

The size of the task, as well as your physical, mental and emotional health, all come into play.

Grief

Sometimes there is no physical task to complete and the overwhelm is simply an experience of intense emotion like grief, shock or horror.

Before I started dealing with my mum’s estate, I had the overwhelming feeling of grief when she died. In a strange way, having physical tasks to deal with at the time made it harder and easier. I had to collect my mum’s belongings from her hospital room while her body was still in the bed. Then there were practical things to do such as collecting the death certificate, contacting relatives and arranging the funeral. But added into the mix was the feeling of guilt – which I believe is normal in most cases of bereavement, regardless of how the person dies. In my case I questioned whether I could have arrived at the hospital sooner, before she died, and whether that would have been better in some way.

Surrender, release, let go

Having lived through two experiences of overwhelm related to sorting through physical possessions, I realised that hanging onto things ties us into past and future timelines.

I realised I was hanging onto things that had no sentimental or financial value. When I forced myself to face up to this, I noticed various thoughts which suggested I might need or want those items in the future. Beneath those thoughts I found a lack of trust that life will provide what I need, when I need it.

If I was hanging onto something because I thought I might need it in the future, even though I hadn’t used it for months or years, then I was feeding beliefs that “the universe will not give me what I need, when I need it” and “I have to look after myself”.

That’s when I realised that feeding these ideas (without realising what I was doing) was actually contributing to creating a future experience of lack, in which I do not receive what I need.

That’s when I realised, I had to let go – not only of the physical items but, more importantly, the limiting belief in lack.

Self-talk & overwhelm coping strategies

Many times, I have experienced what could be described as low-level overwhelm and I’ve been able to feel the fear and talk myself through it, for example, by saying to myself “you can do this”.

Overwhelm means there are lots of something. Sometimes it is one intense emotion and sometimes it is too many thoughts and feelings all at once. Focusing on one thing or one step at a time can help. This can help to foster the belief that you will get through it, this will pass, it can be done, you’re OK.